Reverence | Winter, 2023

Dear Clients and Friends,

The other day my sister asked my daughter, “What’s your favorite thing about Christmas?” My daughter is a senior in high school and I was curious what her answer would be. “I really like the singing,” she responded. 

Singing was part of our family’s advent ritual when the kids were young. After dinner we would turn off the lights, light the advent candles, and sing several advent songs. Inevitably, our quiet singing would turn into raucous, joyful renditions of Christmas carols, and yet it is the sacred songs that my daughter carries as her favorite thing about the holidays.

This Christmas marks the end of an era for our family. It is the last Christmas that all my children will be home for an extended period and I am acutely aware of the preciousness of my time with them. My daughter’s comment reminds me that those moments of shared connection when we are grounded in our own divinity are often what anchor us most to the season and to those we love.
 

As we move into this busy time of year, let's create space for both the joyful exuberance of the season as well the quieter aspects of reverence.

Sarah Thompson
Clean Slate Home Organizing

Handling Gift Giving from Generous Loved Ones

Tips for parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles.

So many clients have shared that they are overwhelmed by the number of presents grandparents and other extended family members give their children at this time of year. Negotiating this dynamic often puts stress on parents’ relationships with their loved ones and adds to the endless stream of “stuff” that enters a home.

If you are a parent...
 

Take a neutral approach grounded in your values.  Let your family members know how important your child's relationship is to each of them and emphasize that your family values gifts of experiences that nurture that sense of connection.

Reflect on your child’s relationship with each member of the extended family and let your loved ones know what experiences might help your child feel more connected to each person.

Plant seeds to help them understand. Shifting family patterns doesn’t happen overnight. You might need to have a conversation with extended family next year too, and around birthdays. Give them, and yourself, the gift of grace to learn new ways of expressing love and connection.

Remember, your children’s relationship with their grandparent is far more important than any gifts they do or do not receive. Set a boundary, make a request, but don’t be rigid about it. For some people gift giving is a language of love and no matter how clearly or neutrally you communicate, your family member will delight in showering your children with gifts. Receive them all with kindness. Have your child select several they really love, and, with gratitude for the relationship, donate the excess to an organization or another family. 

If you are a grandparent, aunt, uncle…

Listen with an open heart when the parent requests that you send/bring fewer gifts. This is not a reflection of the love they have for you. It is simply a plea for peace and ease and joy for their family.
 

Ask the parent “What does the child need? What do they want?”. This can be an easy way to start the conversation about gift giving and often results in a gift that is appreciated and used.

Gift an experience whenever possible. Ask yourself what you could do or share with your grandchild/niece/nephew that would strengthen your connection. 

Don’t expect to see your gifts displayed when you visit if you do choose to give lots of presents. When kids get too many gifts, they can’t take it all in, and often parents -- and kids -- want to pass along what's not not used. Know that one thoughtful gift will often be treasured more than a bunch of items.

Decluttering with Kids before Christmas

Families often don’t have room for all the toys they already have, and the idea of receiving even more toys over the holiday season can be stressful. Here are three ways to engage kids in decluttering ahead of the Christmas season.

Encourage your children to make space for what they really want. Invite your child to notice what they are not playing with, or what they might might be too old for. Help bring awareness to what they have and what they are not using. Often if this is done within the context of making space for new presents, the child is very engaged!

Awaken empathy for others. In an age appropriate way, let your child know that there are families that struggle and invite your child to see if there might be a special toy or two that they are no longer using that other children could now enjoy. This becomes a gentle way of introducing the idea of being part of a larger community and extending care to others.
 

Resort to thoughtful bribery when needed. When my kids were young, I would make a game of having them fill a bag or gather a certain number of toys that they no longer played with in exchange for $5 which they could then use to buy a gift for others. I'm all about creative approaches to decluttering!

Get your home ready for the season.

Schedule a home organizing session.

If you're not relishing tidying up and preparing for a multitude of guests to arrive this month, Clean Slate would love to help you create a calm, welcoming home so you can relax and enjoy all the things you love to do at this time of year.

Holiday home organizing sessions focus on one or two areas of your home that would bring you the most peace. We have just a few spots left this month and I encourage you to book a session by contacting our wonderful assistant, Taylor, at info@cleanslatevermont.com.

We're collecting donations throughout December

Please consider purchasing one or more of the household goods listed below for Wraparound Families

For the third year in a row, Precision Chiropractic in Williston is hosting a housewarming basket drive for Wraparound Families. We are thrilled to announce that Sidepony Boutique in Hinesburg is also collecting items. We are so grateful to both of these businesses!

Here's how you can help:

Simply purchase one or more of the household goods listed below and drop off the items this month at Precision Chiropractic in Williston or Sidepony Boutique in Hinesburg. We'll gather the items and put together the housewarming baskets which will be given to new mothers and families on moving day, along with snacks and flowers to celebrate the start of a new chapter in their life. 

Items we are collecting for Housewarming Baskets

All items need to be in new condition

Please bring items to Precision Chiropractic or Sidepony Boutique in December:

"I am proud to support the Wraparound Families Project and the women who are continuing their journey of making powerful decisions for themselves and their families. These baskets are a way of demonstrating that there is a community of people saying, 'We see you, we support you and we believe in you.' I thank Sarah and her amazing heart for creating this project and for fostering such a sense of home and community."

- Dr. Allison Bogan of Precision Chiropractic  

Nurturing Community

I send inspiring updates seasonally.  If you'd like to support my work, please forward this newsletter to a friend or visit my website. To learn more about my home organizing services, moving services or family coaching sessions, find Clean Slate on Facebook and Instagram @cleanslatevermont or email me at sarah@cleanslatevermont.com.

CLEAN SLATE: Bringing ease to your home, your move, and your family life.