I take up space

Go on and say it. I take up space. Maybe it doesn’t resonate with you at all, maybe it makes you uncomfortable and maybe you don’t know why. These phrases are not affirmations to aspire to or mantras to trick your brain into believing are real through repetition. These are reality statements that are true whether you know it or not. And we know a little something about space in New York City - that is, how precious it is and how critical it is to claim yours. You wouldn’t get anywhere here if you didn’t assert yourself into a crowded train car, flail around like a weirdo to get a cab or email a realtor 12 times about a perfect apartment. Confidence lives in the brain, where synaptic connections can change all the time depending on what you’re prioritizing. Words have a biochemical effect. When you feel sure of yourself, you feel good. Like, physically. It also makes you more likely to take a rewarding risk and keep others engaging with you, which offers a slew of other cognitive rewards. So how do we convince ourselves of something that’s already true? How do we acknowledge all the room in the world for us?

Practice:

Expansion, An ACT exercise in making room for difficult feelings

“Expansion means opening up and making room for difficult feelings, urges, and sensations, thereby allowing them to "flow through" you without a struggle. You don't have to like or want these feelings; you just make room for them and allow them to be there even though they are unpleasant. Once you learn these skills, if these feelings resurface, you have the tools to make room for them and let them ‘flow on by’ so you can invest your time and energy in doing meaningful life-enhancing activities instead of struggling.”

EVERYTHING IS AS IT SHOULD BE

- protective factor of internal belief