"But what about my other kid?"
I hear this heart-wrenching question from Parents all the time. Your teen is struggling with their eating and emotions. They need more time, more energy, more support right now than ever before.
And their siblings, your other kid(s), feel lost in the mix.
This is the impossible struggle of having more than one child and having a child that has pressing needs at the same time. It is impossible to do everything "equally" on your best day, but if you have one child that is struggling with a mental health issue- eating disorder, anxiety, depression- there is a natural, and inevitable, shift in the way the family operates. And this puts the child struggling at the center, with the other kids left to feel...
What?
What do you think your other kid(s) is feeling?
We can't always ensure that our kids get equal time and attention from us. Crisis demands attention. This is life.
So what can we do?
Help your child's siblings make space and make sense of what they are feeling. It is super complicated to share your Parents with a sibling with increased needs- whatever the circumstances. Let them know it is okay to feel anything they are feeling.
Scared? Makes sense.
Sad? Of course.
Resentful? Who wouldn't be?!
Start with legalizing the complex feelings your kid(s) may be feeling about having a sibling that is struggling. Even if they don't say it, offer it to them to let them know it is all normal and valid.
And, if it is possible, carve out a little one on one time with them. Odds are, they mostly just miss you.
All the best,
Bryn
