“Feeling important isn’t about stroking your own ego or making yourself feel like you’re above everyone else. It’s about valuing yourself and recognizing your own self worth and strengths! It’s a really positive way to feel and we wish more people felt like it.”  Browsing through Netflix in search of an interesting movie, I came across a documentary on tragic endings of well-known celebrity actors’ lives, including that of George Reeves, the actor who played the original Superman on television. After watching the first half-hour, turning off the movie became necessary. It was pitiful to watch former ‘stars’ who, due to aging or typecasting, lose their relevance, fading into the dark recesses of time. This same pity is felt when noticing how former sports, political, and other public figures work hard at maintaining their relevance.

     An epiphany blew through my mind like a boulder fallen from a mountainous edge! Innately, we need to feel significant and know that we matter. This moment of enlightenment lingered in my mind. Knowing that I couldn’t have been the first person to have experienced this enlightenment led to my researching our inherent shared need to feel important.  Finding scientific verification for this proposition was easy.

     Authors of one article found that childhood trauma could lead to a sense of insignificance, anxiety, and depression. It certainly can! Do you recall the first time that you felt insignificant? I do. On a Saturday afternoon in the summer before fourth grade, I was walking to the Top Store for candy. The path required me to pass by the parsonage of our pastor - someone who had been a family friend for three generations. The reverend and his wife had adopted their only child, Beverly, as a baby girl, and they gave her much of what her heart desired. She was only a year older than me.

      From the parsonage’s backyard came sounds of children’s loud laughter and frivolity. My, they were having globs of fun! Peering into the yard I saw Beverly surrounded by select 8- to 11-year-old from our church, elementary school, and neighborhood. Stopping dead in my tracks, a queasiness flooded my stomach and thoughts of candy disappeared completely. Crying, I turned and ran home to ask my mother why Beverly hadn’t invited me.  I saw Beverly as a friend and thought that she felt the same. She obviously did not.

      Furious after learning the reason for my upset, Mama took me by the hand, and we walked back to the parsonage. There, she spoke to Beverly’s mother, who immediately invited me to join the kids still in the backyard. By then, the party was winding down. Having thoroughly spoken her mind, Mama graciously declined the Mistress of the Church’s offer, and, frankly, I had no interest in staying. The other children would know that I hadn’t been invited. To this day, it remains unclear why Beverly didn’t invite me to her 10th birthday party. Her reason for excluding me doesn’t matter because on that day, I learned that exclusion hurts badly! Having experienced this pain at the ripe old age of 8 has caused me to not consciously pass anyone without acknowledging the individual's presence. In fact, family and friends will say that I even scurry over to chat with those standing alone at social and professional events. Click below to read the referenced article.

• Creating enriching communal spaces in which Black women can learn and grow together in their phenomenal womanhood while supporting each other.

• Delivering professional development of our members.

• Motivating, developing, and training Black and other youth of color, to show their potential that will benefit society.

• Educating Black women, students, allies, and supporters on topics of interest to our community.

• Promoting Black female entrepreneurialism.

• Giving college and graduate students real-world internships to enhance their competitiveness and preparation for success in workplaces.

• Collaborating with partners to generate elevated ideas and programming to promote members’ and youth’s health, social, and career attainment.

• Ensuring that interests and perspectives relevant to the African American/ Black community are heard and offers a voice for the community.

• Obtaining results by active participation in communities.

Welcome Sister Talia Archie!

Sister-to-Sister, Inc.'s Newest Board Director!

Hailing from the beautiful California Central Valley, Sister Talia Archie is an individual with a heart for all people, and a desire to see them empowered, encouraged and excited for life.  Talia has actively worked in the beauty industry for the last 15 years, starting as a makeup artist for local theater productions, bridal, special occasions and her local news stations, later transitioning into salon life.  After some time behind the chair, Talia felt the pull to go back to her training grounds, Paul Mitchell The School Fresno, and begin her career in post-secondary education as a cosmetology instructor.

Growing up in a family of faith, Sister Talia has had a heart for people and been hands on in her community from a young age, continuing the work now into her adulthood. She is an active member of Moments of Blessings Church in Fresno, CA, where she sings on the praise team and is a leader in the Young Adult ministry group G-10.

Always one drawn to entrepreneurship, Sister Talia is the owner of Silent Diamond Beauty Group, which is a collective of beauty industry professionals and influencers who network, celebrate, promote and inspire one another.  Talia believes in community and the power that comes along with it when one is united together under the same purpose.

She stands in solidarity with the vision and mission of Sister-to-Sister, Inc., standing together, building communities of sisterhood and realizing all of the endless potential that we each embody.

Thank you to Sister Alexis Walker-Dunham and Sister Natilia Sibert of Socafit Dance Academy for a wonderful August gathering, filled with dance, fun, and laughter! We thoroughly enjoyed ourselves. For those who missed this gathering, Sister Nalia has graciously agreed to do a repeat session in 2023.

Come and enjoy the last days of summer outside at Sister-to-Sister, Inc.'s September gathering!

Sister-to-Sister, Inc.

September Backyard Quilt Show - You’re invited!

Fall is fast approaching, and, for the third year, we will have another backyard quilt show. This year, quilters were invited to bring quilted panels. These, with larger quilts, will be displayed in the backyard. Lunch will be provided. Guests will enjoy salads, desserts, and drinks.

Date:     Saturday, September 10, 2022

Time:    1:00 pm – 4:00 pm

Location:  Sister Joette Bailey-Keown’s Home

(Address provided with RSVP.) 

The quilts are always beautiful, and you’ll meet some wonderful sisters.  Come to enjoy the quil6s, fellowship, and the fun!!

RSVP to jebkeown@gmail.com or text 303.330.2965, by Monday, 9/5/2022.

Soothe your Spirit through Meditation.

A Step-by-Step Guide to Making Monday Mornings Less Stressful

By Sandra Thébaud, Ph.D.

Monday mornings are such a stressful time for so many people that the majority of heart attacks occur on Mondays around 9am. Most of us start dreading it on Sunday night and, as a result, don't even fully enjoy the entire weekend. Where is the happiness in that?

  What if you had a way to manage Monday morning stress? What if Sunday nights were more relaxing and Monday mornings, less dreadful.

Here is a step-by-step guide to transforming your Mondays. By the way, this guide can be used for getting through any day, not just Mondays.

Upon Awakening

Set your alarm to go off 15 minutes earlier than usual. I know this sounds like it would create more stress for you, but 15 minutes to get into the mind frame of less stress will do more for you than those extra 15 minutes of sleep.

Once your alarm goes off, sit up. Do not lie back down. If you have to, put your alarm on the other side of the room so that you have to get up to shut it off. Take a few deep breaths and stretch. If you normally exercise in the morning, stick to your exercise routine after finishing your deep breathing. Otherwise, use the rest of your 15 minutes to do a visualization exercise. Visualize yourself feeling good, feeling restful, and successfully accomplishing everything you need to do today. Then begin your morning routine while trying to hold onto the good feelings you brought up during your visualization. Even if you can only hold onto it for an extra 2 minutes, that's better than you did last Monday morning.

Upon Arriving at Work

Take a few minutes before getting out of your car to center yourself and reconnect with the feelings of well-being and peace that you brought up from the morning's visualization to help shield you from the stress emanating from your work environment as you walk into your work space. Before tackling any work, make a list of everything you would like to accomplish for the day and then prioritize them. Do this so that the most important things get completed first and, if you run out of time or get interrupted, the consequences won't be as bad.

At Lunch

Take advantage of your lunch break. It may be tempting to use the time to get more work done but this is about the time when your energy level is low and your body is not fully functioning due to low blood sugar and hunger (especially if you did one of the biggest no-no's in fighting stress which is skipping breakfast). While replenishing your body with nutritious food, replenish your mind by reading a book you enjoy, going for a walk in the park, or just getting out of your work environment. Instead of feeling like you've been at work all day, you can come back to your desk feeling like you took a break from work and start fresh.

An Hour Before the End of the Workday

This is around the time when it seems like the clock slows down and no longer functions normally. You're ready for the day to end but this feels like the longest hour in the day. Do a body scan. This means focusing and paying attention to each part of your body, starting with your head and neck and going down to your feet. If you find any tension in any part of your body, consciously relax that part of your body.

At the End of the Day

Sit in your car for a few minutes and breathe. Congratulate yourself for making it through the day. Hopefully, prioritizing your to-do list allowed you to complete the most important tasks and leaves you feeling a little relieved that they're done. One of the benefits to managing stress is clear thinking. You'll see that over time, managing your stress makes you more productive.

At Bedtime

If you're under a lot of stress, you probably go to bed when you’re exhausted. Unfortunately, exhaustion means that your mind and body were tired earlier in the day and you ignored the signs. Even though you have a lot to do, you'd get more done if you had more energy. Ignoring the signs of fatigue won't get you more energy. It'll put you in a sleep deprived state and then it'll take you longer to accomplish what you could have accomplished in a non-sleep deprived state. It's in your best interest to manage your stress and get adequate rest.

So, before you reach the point of exhaustion, go to bed 15 minutes earlier and try to meditate. Meditation just means that you're relaxing your mind and body. Normally, meditation is done sitting up so that you don't fall asleep, but this time go ahead and meditate while lying in bed. If you happen to fall asleep, that's okay. If you're able to relax your body and clear your mind to the point that you fall asleep, that's a good thing.

During the day, you may have come up with additional ways to lower your stress at work, such as adding calming pictures to your screensaver, playing classical music at a low volume in your work space, or reading an inspirational quote during high stress times. What are some other things you can do?

Don't let Monday mornings interfere with your Sunday nights. Transform your Mondays and fully enjoy your weekends. 

About the Author: Sandra Thébaud, Ph.D., has been a Clinical Psychologist for over 25 years. She is also an author, speaker, and stress management trainer. For more information, click the button below.

© 2021 Sandra Thébaud. All Rights Reserved. 

Book Recommendation of the Month

Having Our Say: The Delany Sisters' First 100 Years

by Sarah L. Delany, Amy Hill Hearth, &

A. Elizabeth Delany

Want to laugh hard, while learning a remarkable story of Black history in America and two strong, invincible Black women? Here's the ideal read.

 Partial Book Overview

Warm, feisty, and intelligent, the Delany sisters speak their mind in a book that is at once a vital historical record and a moving portrait of two remarkable women who continued to love, laugh, and embrace life after over a hundred years of living side by side. Their sharp memories show us the post-Reconstruction South and Booker T. Washington; Harlem's Golden Age and Langston Hughes, W.E.B. Du Bois, and Paul Robeson.

Food and Nutrition Blog

By Sister Teri Sewell Huff

Click to read more of Teri's Blog.