some thoughts for april

helping you be productive & well

I recognize that today is April Fool’s Day, but what’s been on mind is no joking matter. We are nearing the close of the 2021-22 school year and it’s been a challenge for many students, parents, and teachers alike. Even though we’ve made gains in our ability to adapt and live alongside COVID, our students are still struggling – maybe more than ever.

 

Our capable, smart kids are still disintegrating, but above and beyond that, they are now disoriented. Yep, now we have disoriented students! They seem as if they’ve forgotten how to function as students – as if they’ve lost their way or their academic footing. Why? Because almost 2 years of their formative development got hijacked as they made their way through the life (and developmental) disruptor that has been the pandemic.

 

While their physical development likely has unfolded as expected, their social, emotional, and cognitive development has been interrupted and seems, for many, to have stalled. This is problematic – and likely behind their disorientation – because the world, including their school and families – are all moving on in a well-intentioned effort to regain ‘normalcy’.

 

How can we help our disoriented students? Let’s start by meeting them where they are. Not where we want them to be or think they should be. We can do this by paying close attention to what they are trying to tell us with both their words and actions. It’s possible you’ll uncover a need to reconsider their (and your) expectations around school. If, in attempt to get back to normal and catch up, your family has circled back to what were pre-pandemic standards and expectations, it may be backfiring and demotivating your child. Take some time to have conversations about what is working and what isn’t for your student. Listen for clues about why your child is struggling, procrastinating, feels unmotivated and apathetic toward school. Then scrap the old expectations and build new ones that fit the moment and fit your child.

 

Be well. Be safe. Be hopeful.  

"Help is the sunny side of control."

― Anne Lamott

 

FEATURED PODCAST 

 

I'm a big fan of the Ask Lisa Podcast for timely, go-to parenting insights and advice. Episode 65: My Depressed Teen Refuses Therapy. How Do I Help? is one I would highly recommend parents listen to if they have a concern about their child that they feel is beyond their ability to help.

 

 

"I do know one thing about me: I don't measure myself by others' expectations or let others define my worth."

 

– Sonia Sotomayor

FEATURED MEMORY

 

This photo popped up in my Facebook memories from 9 years ago when my youngest daughter was 10 years old. It reminded me about how important it is to accept the invitations to spend time in our kids’ worlds by taking an interest in what they enjoy. Yes, you will be bored, confused, and antsy watching anime, video games, TikToks and YouTube videos – but your interest and attention focused on them for those moments are priceless. It’s a demonstration to them that we want to know them, understand them, and accept them for who they are not for who we think they should or could be. This is a golden opportunity to build trust, respect, and a relationship with your child that doesn’t center around their performance as a student.

 

 

 

SOME MORE THOUGHTS

 

If you were interested in last month's thoughts, May I Have Your Attention, Please?, then I have a follow up recommendation for you. Check out this conversation between Brene´ Brown and  Dr. Amishi Jha  entitled Finding Focus and Owning Your Attention.  Lots of great information and practical strategies to help improve how we use our attention.

 

 

WANT MORE?

 

Information about upcoming events click here.

Below are links to recent interviews, podcasts, and articles. Find more here.

 

 Keep Calm Mother On! Podcast - Helping Kids Flourish 

Sixteen and Vaccined - Episode 5

I wrote The Disintegrating Student to provide an updated roadmap to navigate the daunting journey through today's high-stakes, high-pressure achievement culture. My goal is to start conversations between parents, educators, and other stakeholders to be more astute at recognizing the early signs of struggle and to intervene before students fall apart.

 

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