Cue up Gloria Gaynor .... specifically the first few words of that infamous song of hers, and those lyrics .... "first I was afraid, I was petrified."
Hi Friend! Do you know that song? Can you relate to it, like me?
C'mon ... sometimes maybe? Are you humming it right now?
Last month when I came up with the title of this month's newsletter it was all about being fearless. (and, of course, it is also one of my 365 positive words for this year). One reason I picked this word is that I sometime think I am it. Other times I think I should be more fearless, but, more often than not, I've come to learn I really need to fear less.
This really had me thinking about this fear thing ... being fearless that is (am I really?), and to fear less. Hence that damn song ... which (if you're trying to remember the song, it's called "I Will Survive"). It's not my theme song, but admittedly, it is stuck in my head, and my apologies if you now have that song stuck in your head too).
So here's what I know.
Fear is essential to human survival. Sure it let's us know about danger, and is often the incentive we need to protect ourselves, or even ask for help. Fear of course has a way to ignite our awareness and kicks our senses into high gear. Like is it time to 'fight' or 'flight'?
Here's what I've learned.
Big dreams seem to invite big fears. And, it's normal that fears accompany big dreams.
I have both.
So, does that make me normal? Ha. I'm not sure even what normal is any more.
I asked myself a few questions as I assembled this newsletter (after, of course, wondering why I didn't pick another word from my list, like adventure, or dance, or even the word humour).
Anyways, here's what I often ask myself:
- is it fear that drives me to be fearless, or;
- is it that I really want to fear less to drive me even more?
You see, lately I've been doing a lot of personal writing (my big dream).
While I love writing, I also love creating; so, combining the two really makes me fearless in pursuing my dream to be an author. But here's the thing ... doing so seems to envoke another syndrome I suffer from sometimes; the "what if" syndrome. Do you know what I mean?
What if .........
- I write crap? Or write like crap?
- no one likes what I write? No one reads what I write?
- my writing is misunderstood? Not taken seriously?
Ugh, the negative light of "what if'ing". It seems to creep in from time to time. To me, it's a form of suffocation. Breathe, Deb, breathe. You got this!
Some questions for you, now.
- How do you do it?
- Do you just fear less?
- Do you embrace your fear and do it anyways?
- Do you think this makes you fearless?
- What do you fear?
- What are you fearless about?
- or do you want to fear less, like me?
What if this .... what if I heard from my readers on how my stories impact them? What if there is an upside of "what if'ing"? Since there is an upside to most things, I think there could be a chance here too. I mean at least I hope that is the case for my stories. I'm no longer surrendering to fear; nor am I living under my covers (which I did a few years ago).
I'm getting out there, facing my fears, being fearless while fearing less, and finding my creative outlet to thrive.
Phew. After all that rant and ramble, I want to share something else with you, Friend. I have fearlessly hit 'publish' on the next edition in the series of Deedra's Story books, and it's available in this February edition of:
