We’re leaning into the chaos of life this week. Won't you join us?

Dear friends and family,
It's cliche to say I hope this message finds you well, but it's true. I'm reporting to you from Big Kid's bedroom as he tries to settle down and go to sleep. This is my first quiet moment today, you see, and although I don't like to do work on Shabbat, writing to you doesn't feel like work right now. It feels like sending a smoke signal out into the universe in hopes of reaching someone dear.It's fair to say things are always a little crazy around here. Last week, I went to make coffee and a mouse jumped across the living room floor. The week before that, the fridge broke and the oven went. You know that saying, it never rains but it pours? Well, this house has seen above average precipitation this year. Actually, most years. This week we've split up. Ella took Baby to Israel for a visit and I stayed here with Big Kid to hold down the fort. For a minute there, we considered going all together for a motherland visit, but what with the needs of our differently wired Big Kid and the cost of flights these days we decided on a divide and conquer approach.Conquer may be too strong a term. Maybe more... divide and manage. It's strange to be apart. We've been together 24/7, our little family unit, since 2019, when Big Kid was born and I promptly lost my mind to postpartum insomnia and anxiety. Frankly, I was pretty scared to try to do this parenting thing on my own for two weeks. Especially knowing the intensity of parenting a hyperactive, brilliant, nonstop kid with sensory challenges. Don't get me wrong -- he's a joy like no other. But it can be a lot. Here's what I'll say about this week: We're freaking doing it. All of us together, despite the distance, each playing their own part to keep this ship afloat. I have not yet fallen off the unicycle of scheduling, and lunchboxes, and sensory diets, and craft projects. I'm damn proud of that. Here's what else I'll say, though. It has taken a looooooot of flexibility and leaning into the chaos to make this work. A lot of, shall we say, updated expectations. Yesterday, for example, we spent a good chunk of the afternoon yodeling at the cherry tree and hydrangeas, spraying them to make a rainbow. Despite the activity I had planned inside. Life with Big Kid is full of random, joyful moments like these. This evening, during the kiddush (blessing over the wine) he got off his chair and started dancing. So I joined in and we had a spontaneous dance party. It's surprisingly hard to follow his excellent instincts for playful joy; I want to do what I planned. But the truth is, besides things like brushing teeth and getting to bed at a reasonable hour, it kind of doesn't matter. Sure, let's dress up as superheroes and fight ghosts this morning. Why the heck not? Letting go is an art, one I'm learning to embrace. My Big Kid is teaching me this. And you know what? Life's twists are teaching me that I'm stronger and more capable than I thought I was. Which is pretty cool. Ok. Now some news. Next week (with a little grace and luck) I'm launching a Substack. That's a sort of mini publication where I can share various writings with subscribers like yourself. I'm calling it Welcome to the Chaos Palace because it's going to be a space for celebrating the weird and wacky ways of existing and making change in the world. It will also be the home of these weekly newsletters, which will be archived for posterity. Every other week I will also publish a conversation with a creative person and/or activist whose work diverges from the beaten track. Once a week our little community can get together and chat about a topic I'll provide. I think it's gonna be super cool and I hope you'll join me over there. The site is very beta right now but if you wanna check it out click the button below. In the meantime, enjoy the words and music recommended below. And eat some challah, it's delicious. Shabbat shalom, lovely folks.Yours always,MikhalPictured above: Superheroes always play the ukulele

music

This week, I'm obsessed with corook, an artist who has plenty of music out but is new to me.
I especially can't stop singing their newest song "if i were a fish" (https://open.spotify.com/track/6uL6HCOsEwvnmCX4cDf65g?si=l51xBH17Szmshmu356NIrQ) and their older song "it's ok" (https://open.spotify.com/track/0qPoIRWPqidM08qx9c9Mo7?si=PITQ6awERhWWQ1x1p2Afkw)I'm writing this from my phone and can't figure out how to hyperlink, so hope this works anyway!Big Kid is still obsessing over Good Vibrations and sings "GOTTA KEEP THOSE LAVENDER VIBRATIONS HAPPENIN WITH ME" at the top of his lungs all day.

words

I read a bunch of great essays this week!
Lyz Lenz of the wonderful Substack publication 'Men Tell at Me' wrote an excoriating take-down of all the folks who found it necessary to justify Clarence Thomas's superfun hangouts with someone who collects Nazi memorabilia. https://lyz.substack.com/p/dingus-of-the-week-jonah-goldberg-come-on-manIt's pretty perfectly written. Also, Chelsea Conaboy wrote about why we should be working to set up systems that support parents instead of just shrugging and laughing off the effects of "mommy brain." Perhaps, she argues, if society weren't set up to completely burn out parents, our brains would work. https://chelseaconaboy.substack.com/p/please-dont-talk-about-my-mommy-brainLastly, this feature of Virginia Sole-Smith in The Cut was so good, so powerful, and just makes me more excited to read her upcoming book, Fat Talk: Parenting in the Age of Diet Culture. Get yer preorders in early, it's gonna be a good one. https://www.thecut.com/article/interview-virginia-sole-smith-parenting-fatphobia.html

As always, you can find me on Instagram and Twitter @mikhalweiner and all my writing is at www.mikhalweiner.com.
I actually just updated the site, so maybe give it a look and let me know whatcha think.