When did it begin for you?

I have always loved flying. The first time I set foot on a plane I was technically carried on - I was less than a year old - and I have relished being up in the air ever since.

 

In fact, there were numerous times in my life when I seriously considered becoming a flight attendant. I always found that the role had quite a few things in common with being a psychologist: you get to help people and do your best to make them feel at ease during the time they spend with you.

 

Now, at the beginning of 2021, I know for a fact that I am not the only one for whom flying has an entirely different meaning; I know it does for each and every one of you. And on this day in particular, the images of airplanes and flight attendants remind me of the day - the day on which Covid officially began, at least for me.

 

What is so interesting is that normally, when a great global tragedy happens, we ask: Where were you when so-and-so happened? and even though we all may have been doing different things, we at least all remember the same exact moment in time. That moment in which time itself seemingly stopped to allow for the tragedy to unfold. And that unifies and binds us in the pain and disbelief, making them easier to bear.

 

And there you have it, yet another reason why this Global Pandemic divides and completely disorients us - it began at different moments in time and under different circumstances for us all, and in my case, what makes it even more disorienting is the fact that the day on which it began in my life doesn't even exist this year: it was February 29th 2020.

 

I had landed at JFK after a long-ish flight, looking like what I had jokingly referred to as a Freddy-Krueger-revival: hat, eye glasses, and an N95. You probably won't be surprised to discover that, with the exception of literally three other people inside the packed immigration hall, I was the only one wearing a mask. Given that I stood in line for 2 hours with a crowd of other Europeans coming primarily from Italy, Switzerland and the UK, I was probably exceptionally lucky to have exited with my health intact. As were they.

I share this story with you in my first newsletter of 2021 not with the intent to wallow in the difficult, disturbing and disruptive emotions [and life changes] that this pandemic has caused, but with the intent to invite you to take pause and, as we do with other great global tragedies, remember the moment in which it began for you.

 

Remember for the purpose of not only taking a moment to acknowledge that something this life-altering happened to you, but for the purpose of expressing self-compassion for how you have dealt with it - no matter how you have gone about it.

 

Remember: The Pandemic How-To Manual does not exist. You didn't miss a big announcement, or not get that memo, nor did you forget to sign up for that class. Where you are now - in this moment - is not proof of your incompetence, it is proof of your RESILIENCE.

The final component of this ritual-remembering I invite you to engage in, is to ask yourself a question I pose in my latest blog post, which is: What are you able to do now because you have gone through this pandemic?

 

Answering this question will not only help you engage in a positive psychology practice proven to help you connect with your inner values and sense of purpose, but it will help you experience the soothing power of engaging in a meaningful ritual.

 

Human beings have been practicing rituals for millennia - in order to celebrate, mourn, appreciate, and bear life's various joys and trials - but it is so easy in this fast-paced tech-dependent age to completely overlook their fundamental benefits. I am deeply grateful to the wonderful NY-based Barbara Biziou, a transformational vision coach and a speaker at last year's HUMANITECH conference I organized, for reigniting my interest in the power of the ritual. If you are interested in learning more, I whole-heartedly encourage you to check out Barbara's work.

 

Because we all need some deep, deep soothing right now.

 

And we deserve it.

With that, I want to thank you for dedicating your time and attention to reading my first newsletter of this new year.

 

I hope that you and your families are healthy and safe, no matter where in the world you are.

 

The following are a few helpful (and hopefully inspirational) reminders for you.

Your EQ Reminder

 

We do ourselves a huge disservice believing that we can only feel one category of emotion at any one time - it is possible to feel grateful for being healthy and distraught at the thought of so many people who are not. Embracing all of our emotions is a fundamental requirement for mental well-being.

Your Digital Wellness Reminder

 

Check in with yourself: if the words "inundated" and "obligated" ring true for much of your technology use, it is time to stop, and take stock. Tease apart your work-related vs social vs entertainment technology use, and identify where the overwhelm and sense of obligation stem from. Take steps to reduce those unhelpful experiences as much as possible, and step-up positive, meaningful and nourishing interactions online.

Your Beauty Reminder

E-mail me at psycoach.tp@gmail.com to inquire about working with me.

 

I can help if you are interested in:

*One-on-one coaching*

*A workshop, talk or training for your team, community or organization*

*Consulting for your start-up, for- or non-profit, or brand*

You will see me here more often than in your Inbox:
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