How Parents Can Stay Involved During
Their Child's Time On Campus
One of the hardest moments for many parents is the day they drop their child off at college. My first son's college was only 45 minutes away and it still felt like I was leaving an appendage when I drove away. You worry you'll miss them, but more importantly, you hope they will be OK, on their own for the first time. You want a lifeline, a way to stay connected, but even with the most communicative child, you'll need to be sure there are other means of communication in place. But when it comes to being parent-friendly, not all colleges are created equal. So when researching and visiting schools, look for the following signs they value their parent community and make an effort to include them in a variety of ways:
Does the school acknowledge parents on the admissions tour? Do they speak to what they might be curious about? Does the presentation feel like it is for the family, or just the student?
Does the school address the parent through the admissions emails?
Once their student is enrolled and attending, does the school send out regular updates about campus events and announcements? Do they livestream events?
How easy is it to get information on campus resources such as health care, counseling, academic support and emergency protocols?
Are there parent associations for those who want to get involved on campus? Is there a parent advisory board where parents can provide their insights? Do they send out regular surveys soliciting parent feedback?
All of these actions indicate parents are valued and encouraged to connect with the school. But don't forget: your college-aged child is considered an adult and as such, he or she has to give permission for the college to share their personal information with the parent. By signing the FERPA waiver when they arrive at school, your child can give you these rights. Another suggestion experienced parents often give is: let the level of direct communication be decided by your child. Ask how often they would like to talk on a regular basis. Do they want you to call or would they prefer to do the calling? We definitely want to be there for our child when they need us, but parents also have to be careful not to impose their own needs on the child who is figuring out how to make their way independently.
